Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Christian Tramp Stamps

The recent Christianization of pop culture has spread to various forms: Christian music, Christian heavy metal music, Christian-themed amusement parks, Christian literature (such as the Left Behind series), Christian resorts, and even Christian television.

Many of us young committed Christians are pleased with this development, as it allows us to have our spiritual cake and eat it too -- that is, continue to be Christians while partaking of popular culture. The old-timers, however, suffer from ambivalence; not fully trusting the goodness and sincerity of youth. After all, they point out: the word "sincerity" has "sin" in it.

Recently, this has spread to another, surprising area: tattooing. Specifically, the Cross and the Rock of Ages themes have become more prevalent, as some Christians wish to proclaim their faith through body ink. just as their secular-minded neighbors have chosen other motifs.

Even the oft-scorned "tramp stamp" has been put into play. This type of tattoo, often identified with girls or women of loose morals, has become increasingly chosen as an alternative expression by Godly Christian women who find it a good way to make a Religious Statement. Crosses, Holy Bibles, scriptural verses, and the acronym WWJD have become increasingly chosen as a form of lower back art.

Obviously, the wearer must be moderate in her choice of swimwear, not erring by choosing too-brief bikinis (but the 1960's style swimsuits are acceptable) or jeans that ride too low. Please don't make any cracks here!

We have to applaud this striking development in the general improvement of young people.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

3-7-77





The recurrence of this combination of numbers in Montana is fascinating. Supposedly, it started in the days of the Montana Vigilantes to give the unlawful element (called "road agents" in the parlance of the time) a clear warning to leave town or face the consequences. So what is the meaning of this egnimatic group of numbers? The most widely accepted view is that the numbers represent the dimensions of a grave: 3 feet wide, 7 feet deep, and 77 inches (6 feet 5 inches) long. Alternatively, the “road agent” was given a specified amount of time (3 hours, 7 minutes, 77 seconds) to leave town. Otherwise he would be a grave man. It may, however, be something of Masonic significance.

My theory is just that grown men managed to include some horsing around in what was definitely serious business. Guys love secrets; especially weird ones. This is what adds to membership in the Masons and other organizations with rituals. The Ku Klux Klan did pretty much the same. They did malevolent and illegal things, but managed to have a little dress-up fun and quaint rituals in the process.

After all, how many people know the actual dimensions of a grave? And did watches in the 1860's or 1870's have second hands?

By the way, the Montana State Troopers have the 3-7-77 on their shoulder patches, to indicate that they are serious!












Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Victor's Secret: A Response to States' Obesity Problems


During the past 20 years there has been a dramatic increase in obesity in the United States. In 2009, only Colorado and the District of Columbia had a prevalence of obesity less than 20%. These are the states with the highest obesity percentages: Mississippi, Alabama, Tennessee, West Virginia, Louisiana, Oklahoma, Kentucky, Arkansas, South Carolina, Michigan, and North Carolina. Now we can view it as a health issue; or we can view it as a possible marketing opportunity. Bear with me on this.



With male obesity comes moobs, female-like breasts. Now these will, shall we say, need to be supported. Why not a line of male bras to support their extra tissue? But let's sweeten the demand: use colors that guys like, advertise their comfort, and so forth.




And why not get licenses from professional sports teams to have their logos on the male bras? These ought to really sell. Sell them at stores named Victor's Secret, to capitalize on the already-present familiarity of Victoria's Secret.



I can see neighbor of mine from Franklin exercising while wearing his Tennessee Titans sports bra!


Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The T-Shirt Rebellion

The new dress code annoyed the students at Fulmer High School: it seemed to abridge their rights and curtail their sense of style too much. One aspect of it was particularly noxious: it was the section that, although it allowed the wearing of t-shirts and sweat shirts, limited the content of what was written on them. This seemed to be de facto in violation of the Constitution, which allows free speech.

Obviously, spirit t-shirts were okay; especially those for FHS or UT. And those with innocuous messages would pass muster too. However, no controversial messages, no Rebel flags, no beer or cigarette or drug themes, no messages that might be regarded as obscene, lewd, or antisocial.

The dress code came with teeth: detention for the first offense. and suspension for the second offense. Some students tried mass disobedience; but they were duly punished with detention for their infractions. In all, it seemed that the Principal and other powers that be had buffaloed them; and they settled into a surly silence.

However, six enterprising girls had a solution: devise t-shirts that had messages that would annoy the administrators, but not be in violation of the rules.

Now this was true creativity.

One of them had an astonishing idea that was so off the wall that it invited some titters at first; but then it sank in as a great idea.

That weekend, they got t-shirts printed at the mall, and agreed to wear theirs on Tuesday.

On Tuesday, Willow wore a green t-shirt with 36C on it. Megan wore her violet 34C one. Heidi wore a red 32A tee that looked splendid on her! Deena's green one had 34B on it. Dee Dee's black one was labeled 36C. Finally, Heather's was a 36B yellow one.

What could be done about this? There was gnashing of teeth in the Principal's Office, and titters in the faculty lounge.

In days to come, some other girls donned t-shirts with similar messages.