Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Venues for Laundering Money

Ah, the life of crime has its pitfalls and requirements. Money laundering is one of those. Naturally, you can solve the problem by opening a coin-operated laundry, possibly on Minneapolis's south side. Or rent out vending machines. It's kind of amazing, however, that your typical candy machine pulls in $10,000 per day. They must be continually lining up at the machine!

But there is room for novelty here. Why not (I ask retorically) open a Tea Cozy Shop? Or how about a Bait and Bra Shop? Obviously, no Federal agent would think of organized crime using such an innocent venue with alliteration. Then, since cheerleading is so popular, a Pom-Pom Shop would be something to consider.

I'm so glad that the ten cents tax on espresso failed in Seattle. An Espresso and Mountain Dew Bar should be considered to meet the joint trade of the yuppie NASCAR fans. Residents will find it irresistible to browse in a Gorilla Dress Shop! Or run a Retreat for Sleazy Legislators. Yessir! There are niches for imaginative hoods nowadays. And I betcha the FBI would never figure out any of them. Yah!

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