Thursday, May 3, 2012

Dancing on Saloon Tables

Helena, Montana has a law that states that a woman may not dance on a table in a saloon unless she is wearing at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.

My Question is, how do they know?  Is there a unit in the Helena Police Department that visits saloons with scales?

Is there much of that sort of thing going on lately?  Is it okay when the legislature is not in session?

Excuse me while I weigh my clothing.  Hmmm.....So much for not wearing a bra.  Should I put on windbreaker and hat as well?

And, of course, socks.  Maybe also wear running shoes. 

Odd law.


  1. Is that why justice is allegorically represented as holding scales?

  2. I think a pair of cowboy boots would get you to the limit all by themselves.

  3. There was an episode of the Andy Griffith Show many years ago in which Deputy Barney Fife (played by Don Knotts, if you recall) was afraid he wouldn't be able to pass his police physical because he was underweight. In the end, Sheriff Andy found a loophole that let Barney pass the physical: because Barney had to be weighed wearing only underwear and his identification tag and chain, Andy found a huge, industrial strength chain to hang the little ID tag on. As for the law in Helena, I'd be REALLY interested to see the legislative history on that one and see how the 3-pounds-two ounces rule was devised. And maybe you could wear one of those stainless steel bras the ladies in Wagner operas wear?

  4. Three pounds is a little on the warmish side, I think.